and the dish ran away with the spoon

So I figured I should write about my experience celebrating Hari Raya Aidilfitri alone in Jogja. Alone as in there wasn't anyone I know here who actually celebrated Hari Raya with me. Not alone literally.

But the experience was so confusing, sad and lonely, that I'm not going to. Just because. I'll let you imagine it yourself how celebrating raya on your own is like. Yes, I did have friends (at least acquaintances) who went out of their way to keep me company of which I am extremely grateful. But you know, it's just different. You're the only one. No matter who else was with you. Whatever anyway. This crap would just be depressing.

Speaking of depression, I am rather worried because I still haven't found a case for our course work. Way to make a non sequitur Nona. This is however a very valid worry because the doctor in charge is a monster with many rings. No really. She has like 16 on both hands and the first thing I thought when I saw them was that, If she ever hit her kid in the head, they'd suffer from a mild concussion. Anyway, here's to making some headway on that tomorrow.

I actually had a reason to write tonight. Most of it being caused by fluctuating hormones making me feel like shit, really really sad shit but I don't think I can write any of that freely. But I can't talk about this shit freely either. Which leaves me in a conundrum of piling everything in again. Which is never good because when everything blows up, the resulting mess hurts more.

Ah well. And on that note of hormones not making any sense no matter how many sense their actual cycle makes, I leave you with .... basically nothing

thanks for reading. If you made it this far

akunona