buka mata, tutup mata

as the Malay saying goes.

We're at the last ten days of the Islamic month of Ramadhan.
How has your ramadhan been?

I'm still thinking about mine.

thinkingstill

AkunOnA

-insert obligatory birthday post here-

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATSUMOTO JUN!!!!

Here's a birthday post for our fabulous diva, Jun-kun.

I say obligatory but I've spent the entire day thinking what is it that I want to write. Unfortunately, today it seems that I have the dumb so here's a normal birthday post.
Happy birthday MatsuJun. Stay healthy. Stay happy. Stay fabulous. Thank you for being the awesome Matsujun we all know and love. With all your doS-ness, your dorkness, and your epic fan service. Good luck on Natsuniji. Even though I can't stomach it, doesn't mean I'm not cheering you on. Have a happy and wonderful time.

Have a fail drawing of matsujun during the Msute To Be Free performance.

Whilst I wasn't exactly Jun-Baited, he was the first member I could easily identify when I was still new to Arashi (strong face jokes here). His dedication and drive to his work are things that I greatly look up to. Not to mention that we're both August babies (what? I'm sure that all Arashi fans born in August feel the same way :D). Jun-kun, you'll always have a special place in my heart.

so, anyway, Happy Birthday.

matsufabepicness

AKunOna

Meaningless trip down memory lane

My high school was a boarding school. We weren't a fancy full boarding school or SBP, nor were we private. We just became a boarding school.
Even I don't know why we were. And I lived there for 5 years. The special thing about my school was we had this KRK program. It stood for Kelas Rancangan Khas which sorta means special program. Not that I remember anything special about it.

When I was in form 4 or, fourth year, which ever you want to look at it, we had a new program called SISP. A program where primary school kids from year 4 to year 6 stayed at out dorm and went to our school. They had their own classes of course, they took primary school work but they just shared our building.
I don't know what the logic behind that was, there were just there one year and continued to be there. I kinda want to ask one of them if it was any good. If it really opened doors or anything.

I wasn't social in high school. More of a quiet, studious kid, with serious temper issues and a stickler for rules. A teacher's pet maybe. Don't look at me, I have no idea how I came out like that. I wasn't popular.

I didn't have a lot of friends in my first year. I didn't really make any good friends, I think, until second year. But still then, I was a loner most of the time.
I didn't really talk to boys. I still don't really talk to boys, but not as bad as I was back then.
Somehow though, I stuck out. Maybe because I had an older brother there. The teachers knew who I was and I have a somewhat funny memory that happened at the dining hall due to my connections in my first year.

We have this PMR exams that everyone takes in third year. If you had good results, you had a chance of transferring to a better school. An SBP or go into MARA colleges. I was hoping to transfer to an SBP you know. I had good results but in my fourth year, when everyone had offers to other schools I didn't get one. I cried, I remember.
So I stayed another two years at Tualang. Finishing my secondary school education. I was made prefect in my fourth year and oddly enough, head girl in my fifth.

I didn't deserve both posts. I still think it was because of connections rather than my own abilities. Not that I exploited it, no. It was just expected I think. That because I had good connections, I was good too. Not really.

I had a lot of fleeting crushes but the one that lasted the longest was from year 3 and continued beyond that. Not that I have ever been in a relationship. It was pretty much one sided. You can guess that I am severely lacking in the social skills department. This makes me really, really glad though, that I didn't transfer out of my school because, maybe, I would never have made it. Anyway, I liked him. And that's all I'm going to go into that.

I never knew that there were so many choices of what you wanted to do and where you wanted to go after SPM. I mainly thought that matriculation was my only chance and thankfully, I did make it there. And now, I'm where I am. I don't know how I made it, but I'm really thankful that I did. The continuous mental breakdowns notwithstanding.

I think, what I'm trying to say here is, the one thing I loved most about high school is my group of friends. I miss them. I missed the fun we had together (as much fun as you can have while being the stick-in-the-mud.) I missed out mostly, but I had my own fun. I am thankful that I had been given the chance of meeting these lovely ladies.

So, they are organizing a breaking fast event for sometime early next month. My notifications in facebook are flooded. I've been dutifully keeping myself updated by skimming through the comments. And was suddenly struck by a feeling of melancholy. So I wrote this.

I'm planning on going. It seems interesting enough. I haven't met most of these people since I finished highschool erm... 4-5 years ago. It would be fun, but at the same time, I don't really want to go. Because somehow, I remember I don't fit in with this group of people that much. Even if I went, maybe I'd spend the time with Leika or Syamok if she makes.
It seems that I haven't changed much. Still the loner, the studious kid with the glasses and the eccentricities. Though I think I do have a handle on the whole temper thing nowadays.

andmaybeijustdon'twanttomeetyou

AkunoNA

entry of expected depression

results finally came out today. I had Aqilah take mine for me since I'm obviously not there right now.

I failed my oral medicine paper. It was for the first block of the sixth semester if I'm not mistaken. Even after remedial papers I still failed that paper. I had expected it really.

I couldn't answer both papers. The real exam and the remedial papers. I had prepared myself for that particular blow. But getting the news still hurt. Hahahaha

At least I didn't fail the minor surgery skill lab as well. I had expected that. Because, come on, anesthesia is a very important step. Thankfully I didn't.

Mom said that this is a very important experience. It's good because failing will make you work even harder. Right now though, I don't really want to think about it. I have another semester before I go into clinicals.

will work harder. Will work better.

I won't let this happen again.

InsyaAllah.

notreallytakingthisgracefullyamI

AkunonA

Home

Finally.
After spending around 2 weeks doing nothing in Jakarta, I'm finally home.

Still doing nothing though. But now I'm doing nothing at home. Which is cool.

Arrived on the 15th at around 3 o'clock.

And my brothers gave me a present.

I have admittedly rather sweet brothers. Hahahaha.
Thank you for the present. :)

ah well, I should probably go to sleep now. It's late rather. And we have to wake up early for sahur and all that. So, good night.

ninomeow kazunari is big now

AkunOnA

22

is the magic number.

not really. but today is my birthday. 12th August (as I write this, in Indonesia it's still 11.52pm)

So, last night, I greeted my birthday with my physiology book. No, really. I was bored and thought I could do some brushing up on my physiology. So, I greeted my birthday with cardiovascular physiology. All there is to know about resistance and hydrostatic pressure.
I am nerd, yes.

Anyway, don't feel any different. Still the same old me, just maybe some bunch of new cells proliferating somewhere.

We had ice-cream and crisps and wafers while watching "Get Smart" after we came home from tarawih. Bai, Ezzah, Ain and Anum came around as well, so it was pretty cool.

All in all, a pretty awesome way to celebrate.

Thank you.

random fireworks picture to communicate that, actually, I'm pretty happy :)

22 and a day

AkunonA

sugi e sugi e to

Just some lyrics to the song I'm currently listening too.
It's Arashi's "Movin' On" if you were interested. Anyway.

Today I woke up amazingly late. After I had went back to sleep again of course. But really, that doesn't count. So, I don't really like to wake up so late. It makes me feel guilty somehow. Haha

Weird person I am.

Tomorrow we are going to go to Kota Tua. I should probably charge my cellphone. It's fairly important. And we'll probably be taking pictures. So, wait a minute...

alright, that's done

Anyway. Tomorrow we're gonna set out early. And we have to wake up early to make lunch because we're gonna have a picnic of some sort as well. Maybe I'll bring some crisps as well. We'll see.

I'm not really enthused as you can see. Most probably because I'm just going with the flow. Since everyone decided to go, I'm just going along. It's not like I'm really doing anything at home right now. So, why not?

Don't really expect a lot of input on the trip though. I might not write about it until maybe three weeks after. Haha.

One thing I've been thinking about recently. The Arashi new album.

Some people are moaning and groaning at the use of auto-tuning in the album.

I personally have no problems with it though. Mostly because to me, I want to listen to a good song. I don't care how you make it, how you sing it, or even sometimes, what you're singing about. I just want a good song. If the auto-tuning makes the song better, then I have no qualms with it. To me, it's still a good song.

If I want to listen to real singing, I'll listen to other songs. If I want to do some head banging, I'll listen to some other songs.

That kind of thing.

Maybe I have no real principle on what I'm listening to, but to really describe it, I just want to listen to a good song.

It's like, I can't really stand hip hop, but still I listen to some songs by Eminem because he makes some good songs.

It just comes down to personal preference anyway, cry moar kinda thing.

I love the new album. And surprisingly, my favourite member solo is Matsujun's. Nino's is good but kinda, you know. Just good. The meaning behind the song is sweet though. Sho-chan's is listenable, but not really something I'd put on repeat. Aiba's is aiba-ppoi and I laugh everytime he sings -discotique, discotique- because really???? . Oh-chan's solo is something he's done. Kinda like 'Song for me' and 'Take me far away'. It's good. Oh-chan's vocals are awesome. But it's too done.

All in all, I really like this album. :) Good job, Arashi.

Good luck in your concerts this year!!!

randompostpwns

AkunOnA

Am I?

Am I the only one who found it really awesome at the reference to "Fantasia-The Sorcerer's Apprentice" in "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" movie?

Axing brooms and the shadow on the wall????

Flooded rooms and relentless cleaning????


I am almost 22 and I still sorta love Disney.

mulan will forever be my favorite though

AkunOnA

So we have finished

Our third year.
All results for the most recent exams are out.

I'm glad to say I didn't fail anything. Marks leave something to be desired but I am happy with what I got.
Anything else? Going home on the 15th though, I can go home tomorrow if I wanted to. And if I had the money to change my tickets. That's not entirely possible now.

How people change is awesome you know. It's sort of disconcerting.

Either way, I'm feeling weird. You can tell.

Have some pictures of recent life

rainy morning before an exam

dragonfly on our gate


atashinomiteirufuukeiha...

AkunonA

i'll come back later

when I am more awake than I am right now.

I just wanted to say "thank you" to my friends for the nice surprise. :)

BBQ chicken is yummy. And you guys are awesome.

And you can never have too many earphones. Especially if you're me.

Here's a haiku. Of which I don't care. I just like it.

kawan kawan ku
korang semua busuk
terima kasih

It's 5-7-5. *is stubborn*