of Sentimentality

Also known as a disturbed state of mind. 

Today's your birthday. I don't know why my mind persists in remembering this, but it does. Today is your birthday. Well, the 9th is. If this turns up posted on the 10th.

So happy birthday to you. May you have an awesome year and years and years ahead. I have no idea what you're doing now. Last I heard you're working. As what? I have not the slightest idea.

I have no idea why I still remember you. With all the stuff you've said about me. I'm sure it's a pretty little ego stroke. But I'm sorry that I was never pretty. Even though I have always been little. I'm sure you're happy where ever you are. I'm doing good. Oh, don't worry. I don't really love you anymore. It's more like a soft spot. A little bit of sentimentality (a disturbed state of mind). You will always be kind of, sort of important. 

Hey, you can even say, you made me who I am today. Though that's mostly my fault, innit? 

God bless, and may you forever be happy. :)

needed to get it out of my system

akunona

It's almost valen - *BOOM*

Pagan holiday? A remembrance for that executed father who married couples illegally? Some thing to do with the criminal underworld? Whatever your argument, this :

is not a heart. 

This, however:

is (a rough drawing of) a heart.

And then, we have the malay word "hati". Which means, heart. But also, oddly, translates into this:

which, if you can't tell, is a liver.

But, enough of semantics. As interesting as they may sound.

Any plans for "lover's day"? Or, in my case, "Single's Awareness Day"? 

Hmm. Probably not, since according to my calander, it would be a Tuesday. And I go to work on Tuesdays. So does everyone else. But hey chocolate's on sale.

Dermatology and Venereal diseases posting started last Monday. Next week would be the oh so awesome second week, in which we pretty much do nothing anyway. Maybe a paper needs to be written at some point. I have no idea of the plans. I did score on the pretest. But that generally just puts pressure on me to score during the post test.  And damn it, I don't need pressure. I however, do need a holiday.

In recent beings, nothing much. Just generally being. Finished one book out of the three I bought last weekend. It was nice. Now reading a second book, which is also nice. But I'm only halfway through. And I have a horrible itch to draw something but I don't want to just draw. I want to draw something nice. Something pretty. 

So, yeah. Have at it. I'mma gonna go and finish reading my book.

akunona

all the drawings were done by me in MSpaint. Have at it, no terms and conditions apply, though I  do wonder what would you be doing with a picture of a liver.

The Epilogue of Dr. Skelling Tone : Part the Thousandth

The gentleman skeleton tipped his hat politely.

"Fine weather we seem to be having, do you not think so?" asked the gentleman skeleton, tipping his hat politely.

"Rather cold I should think," the young girl replied.

"Ah, but I find you to be rather under dressed in your night things. Pray tell, what are you doing out this lovely evening?"

The young girl looked up quizzically into the gentleman skeleton's empty eye sockets.

"But you have not yet introduced yourself. I would hardly tell a stranger as to what I am doing," she said.

"Ah, my apologies young girl. It appears my manners have left me as have my skin and musculature. Please, let me introduce myself; I am Dr. Skelling Tone. Pleased it is to meet your acquaintance," Dr. Skelling Tone bowed in a grand gesture.

The young girl could here his spine creak and she curtsied in reply.

"My name is Miss Lay Dei, this is Mr. Raggard Dei and we happen to be lost."

"But that is such a predicament Miss Lay Dei!" Dr. Skelling Tone exclaimed, his bones shuddering in empathy.

"It is rather troublesome, Dr. Skelling Tone, but it seems that we have taken a wrong turn after ToyLett Town going into Hallway Down, Mr. Raggard Dei here being reluctant to ask for directions." Miss Lay Dei explained, glaring slightly from the corner of her eyes at Mr. Raggard Dei who hung limply in her hand. He looked rather sorry.

"Well, have no fear, my dear, dear Miss Lay Dei. For I am a doctor! And I will give you directions! Where, pray tell, is it that you are heading towards?" Dr. Skelling Tone threw out his arms in another grand gesture.

Miss Lay Dei stared at where Dr. Skelling Tones bony feet did not touch the ground, her small features set into a frown.

"We were heading for the RedBoom before we lost our way."

"Oh, but the RedBoom!" Dr Skelling Tone exclaimed.

"Can you help us, Dr. Skelling Tone?"

"Why, I do believe I can, Miss Lay Dei! You are now in the Clow Zet and the RedBoom is not that far away. All you have to do is take four, three steps left till you get back to where you started, look up and you will have found yourselves before the RedBoom gates," Dr. Skelling Tone grinned, empty eye sockets dark with glee.

"Oh thank you, Dr. Skelling Tone. You have been of such help. Mr. Raggard Dei and I are very grateful," Miss Lay Dei exclaimed. Mr. Raggard Dei bounced hand in hand with Miss Lay Dei with joy. 

"It is a pleasure to be of service Miss Lay Dei." Dr. Skelling Tone bowed again, vertebrae clacking.

Miss Lay Dei curtsied in reply.

"Before I take my leave for the RedBoom, may I ask you one question Dr Skelling Tone? Disregarding this one of course." inquired Miss Lay Dei as she straightened from her curtsy.

"You may, my dear Miss Lay Dei."

"You are a doctor are you not, Dr. Skelling Tone? But what is that a doctor are you of?"

Dr. Skelling Tone laughed, a whispery timbre, like wind through bones.

"A simple doctor Miss Lay Dei. I am but Dr. Skelling Tone of the Clow Zet and it was a pleasure to meet you."

Miss Lay Dei smiled, Mr. Raggard Dei bounced, and Dr. Skelling Tone grinned his skull grin.

"The pleasure is all mine."

and he laughed, a whispery timbre, like wind through bones

akunona

NONA'S NOTES : I don't need to point out anything I think, since this is about as subtle as a flaming brick through your window. Grammar and I had a divorce recently. As you can see, it's very messy.

Just a random composition centered around a random doodle. Objects may appear closer than they seem.

We want a cure for procrastination! When do we want it? Tomorrow!

I should actually be getting ready for work. But life is defined by the things we procrastinate. Humhaa

Last week at Simpangan Depok. I have Surgery and Anesthesiology at Husada next. On the plus side, I don't have to rent a new room because Husada is relatively near. You know, in the way two bus route changes and having to wake up at the ass crack of dawn is near. Ah, things we co-ass do to get to work where we are treated lower that that rag you have there under your feet. Fantastic. Moan and groan, moan and groan. But then I realize, I really love doing this stuff. Not like. Love. Then everything is fine, rinse and repeat. Because damnit Medicine.

How's life nowadays? Doing dine. Being rather free since I finished my theory exam last Thursday and my physical exam exam Monday. We're really just laying around. We still do follow ups, presenting patients during rounds, running to get labs, being on call and all that stuff though. But having sat through the exams brings a false sense of freedom. Not really, because like I said,we're still working. Anyway, holding the pediatric neurology file this week. For the last time. And it's a really awesome case though. Complex Febrile Seizure with history of seizure without fever. Pretty interesting but only to me apparently.

Apparently that person thinks that my siblings and I aren't mad at her because when we came to her house during raya a year ago, we weren't angry.

She apparently expected us to act like uncivilized children and scream her eardrums out or bash her head in using the trowel. Maybe I'll take her up on her offer. You know. Bash her flat screen with my bare fists, possible major injury be damned. But then a again, I am a civilized person. So maybe I'll just kick her kid when she's not looking. Or maybe not. That's just my emo talking. Anyway, lets all put our hands together, and bash a hole in the wall.

I have issues as you can probably tell.

Okay. So enough of that. Lets just get ready for work and face the day with a smile. while inside, a house is burning, the ashes falling like black, black snow and the smell of burning wood will be invigorating.

What the hell is with guys and damsels in distress anyway? I don't get it. Must I act like some victim to get a guy's attention? Please, tell me.

oh dear, i am so weak and need protection, what ever shall i do

akunona

there maybe issues that need addressing but damnit. I'll be okay soon

Shallow much?

I'm sure everyone and their cats know the most recent world disaster. The earthquake, following tsunami, and the problems with nuclear reactors (and I've read an allusion to but not news itself of, a whirlpool?) in Japan right now. I am a sort of Japan-fan myself, what with one of my life goals is to be able to visit Japan at some point so I was shocked with the news.

Even though, I have to take this chance and admit that the first thing I thought was, "Are Arashi and my other Johnny biases safe?"

Yes, it does sound shallow. Horribly, horribly shallow. Thousands of people are dead and the first thing you thought about was your idols?

But when you think about it, and one person in a forum I follow pointed out more eloquently than I can ever hope to, is that, I actually know these people. Superficially yes, but it doesn't mean that I don't love them. And before you say anything, no, I'm not trying to justify anything. That's not what I'm trying to do. I'm just wondering why my knee-jerk reaction would be to think "Are Nino, Jun, Sho, Aiba and Oh-chan safe? What about Ueda? What about -insert other Johnny's artist here- ?" and so on before I think "Oh my god, loads of people are dead! That is so sad!"

So what I think is; it's because I have a vested interest in them? I love them and want them to be safe. Not because I want them to be alive so they can continue working and being a source of entertainment to me, no. It's because I genuinely wanted them to be safe. And even their families to be safe. Out of the millions of people in Japan, the first people I thought about were my biases. Then I thought about Rai's foster family. Then other lj-ers in Japan whom I don't know but have heard of through fandom.

What actually brought about this post was a post made by another arashi fan. I had been thinking about the shallowness before, but I had not thought to actually write about it until I read her post. I'm not particularly eloquent but, I'll try.

She said that after the initial shock of hearing Japan's disaster, she was slightly put-off by fandom's response of only thinking about the safety of their respective idols. Causing a flood of posts stating the confirmed safety of not only Johnnys idols, but other Jpop artists, Jrockers and even manga artists and seiyuus (voice actors). Even some reports of the state of some Johnny idols houses. And it was like people in fandom were holding these lives more than they would hold the lives of other normal people in Japan. It's true actually. She has a very valid point.

In the end, maybe it’s because we’re human? And this is a rather fatalistic view of life and human behavior but I think humans will always respond more to what interests them, what has an immediate relation towards them. I’m sure many would disagree but that’s what I think. People will always think about themselves first. Because these idols have a relation to me, because I want them to be safe, then I think about them first. I do not know the thousands other actually dead or suffering, I feel sorry for them, I wish them well, but that’s it. On the other hand, I want my idols to be safe. I want to know they are safe. I want official confirmation that they are alright.

But then again, what’s amazing is though, after the initial flood of posts about the safety of various idols and artists, there was another wave of posts about donations and auctions being held to raise money. What I think in a way, this shallowness and this kind of human interest has a good side as well. Because of this initial interest, people are actually trying to help. The response has been kind of amazing (from the view point of a virtual outsider anyway, but still). Because this interests me directly, I am helping.

Haha, a lot of people will disagree with me on this. I’m not up for a debate though, so yeah, don’t bother? This is my opinion and analysis on why I reacted the way I did. Why I’m sure hundreds of other fans reacted the way I did. I’m just putting this out there. I’m not saying this is a bad thing though. I just want to know why.

This argument (?) is everywhere. You can tell I’m not a particularly eloquent person. Much more when it comes through something like a screen. But if you get something from this, either an opinion of how weird I am or an argument of the values of celebrity (which may have ended this post three paragraphs ago) or a view on humanity, I’m glad.

And another thing, a few hours after the initial news, there was info from a fan that Fuji TV stated Arashi are safe. Followed by more information on the other groups I follow. I won't lie and say I wasn't immediately relieved because I was. I was instantly (and am still) very glad to know that they are safe.

But let’s not forget about the others as well. Let’s not forget about the millions devastated by this tragedy. Lend a helping hand. Do it in your own way. Who cares in what way.

Pray for Japan.

akunona

p/s: This is the first time I’ve ever posted about a world tragedy. Why? Because I love Japan, it has something to do directly with me, thus I am interested. I am not a very good person am I?

Also, I may come to regret posting this. LOL

picture source here

Twothousandeleven

New years resolutions? To not make anymore new years resolutions. Oh wait... damn.

Arrived safely in Jakarta yesterday afternoon. Had to lug a 10 kg bag everywhere while wearing platform heels. Yes. My legs, they cry in pain. But since I do not like waiting, nor bothering anyone else, I went on my own merry way. Lugging a 10 kg bag. Okay, okay, so it was actually around 9.7 kg.

I think the taxi driver scalped me. Can't really say.

I miss home already :( But there's nothing really to help it. Who asked you to accept the damn offer?

My first experience of watching Kouhaku Uta Gassen? Hmmm. I can understand probably half of what they were talking about but when they start talking over each other or talking too fast, I get lost. Or when someone's asking me questions as to what they are saying. Hahaha. Arashi did a good job. They looked rather stiff but then again, it is Kouhaku. Maybe. Sho-chan stuffed up at "Funky Monkey Babys" . LOL. And Oh-chan as Kaibutsu-kun is adorable as always. The man is freaking 30! He is cute!!! I do not understand my brain.


And I kinda like this band called One OK Rock, pronounced One Ok'rock, as in One o'clock. Japanese and their word games. But it's something I can appreciate. :)


Anyway, happy new year everyone! Random updates of life is not very interesting but hey. May this year be more productive and happy for you and everyone you love. I hope this year isn't as hard as the last, but I think anyway, I have grown quite a fair bit. I learnt a lot and I hope to learn some more.

明けましておめでとうございます
akunona

Verily, it is danger

Aibacchi. Because you are awesome, I spent 20 minutes thinking up what it is that I would like to say to you on this day.
It should have been yesterday, I know, since yesterday was your day. But I've been in a slump lately. I have no idea why though.

And so, Aiba-chan.

Happy birthday Aiba Masaki.

May you have a wonderful year. May you stay awesome and happy and all sunshiny and stuff. I love you and wish you all the best in your coming drama. Don't forget to eat regularly and rest when you can.

***

In other news, I have been home for three days and being home is awesome. So very, very awesome. I don't want to leave ever again. You can't make me!!!

Aibababye

akunona

Aidiladha

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT HARI RAYA AIDIL ADHA

2nd time sambut hari raya aidiladha dekat rumah ni. Gambar adalah gambar masjid depan rumah. Dari semalam takbir. :)
Tahun ni berkorban apa?

extra pic:

On Friday last week. Before exam Integrasi 28.

bau kambing busuk

akunona

A little spam

Since I already posted this on my FB but hey, I like this picture :)


in which Aiba is distressed, Oh-chan is awesome, Sho fails, Nino's pissed, and Matsujun thinks he doesn't get paid enough for this.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI

maafzahirdanbatin

Akunona

-insert obligatory birthday post here-

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATSUMOTO JUN!!!!

Here's a birthday post for our fabulous diva, Jun-kun.

I say obligatory but I've spent the entire day thinking what is it that I want to write. Unfortunately, today it seems that I have the dumb so here's a normal birthday post.
Happy birthday MatsuJun. Stay healthy. Stay happy. Stay fabulous. Thank you for being the awesome Matsujun we all know and love. With all your doS-ness, your dorkness, and your epic fan service. Good luck on Natsuniji. Even though I can't stomach it, doesn't mean I'm not cheering you on. Have a happy and wonderful time.

Have a fail drawing of matsujun during the Msute To Be Free performance.

Whilst I wasn't exactly Jun-Baited, he was the first member I could easily identify when I was still new to Arashi (strong face jokes here). His dedication and drive to his work are things that I greatly look up to. Not to mention that we're both August babies (what? I'm sure that all Arashi fans born in August feel the same way :D). Jun-kun, you'll always have a special place in my heart.

so, anyway, Happy Birthday.

matsufabepicness

AKunOna

because i am epic and some added notes of no particular worth

Happy 27th Birthday Nino!!

in more correct terms, I am epically late.

Though, to be fair, I didn't even want to make a post until after exam weeks. But;

a. I have a headache and I want to take my mind of off things
b. I sort of love this guy too much
c. I am just eternally bored

take your pick. There can never be a wrong answer

Anyway, Ninomiya Kazunari. I love you. Stay safe, stay happy, have a wonderful year. Good luck in everything, take care and drive safely when you finally can next year. <3<3<3

***

On another note, unrelated to fandom and random declarations of love and odd sentimentality, I hate exams. We are, as I have mentioned in the middle of exam weeks. Just finished one week, another one to go. Around 4 - 5 papers left to wade through and heaps of notes to read at least once and try to make heads or tails (or in some extra cases, added limbs) of.

I moan and groan and go through the motions.


And I've started listening to Pink Floyd. Mostly because I loved the beginning song in Ao no Honoo which, after some searching, I found out to be called "the post war dream" by Pink Floyd. I'm going on a limb and calling it the song of my childhood, Pink Floyd I mean. Which isn't all that wrong because my parents, especially my dad, is a fan. We used to put on their records a lot when I was small. So, I actually know some of their songs even if I don't recall the entire album. And the Beatles and Elton John.

I'm rather sorry to say that I only listen to songs because I like to listen to songs. I just love music. I don't search for any particular meaning. So this pretty much goes over my head. I hear legions of fans screaming blasphemy at me. Don't care. I like 'Another Brick in the Wall'. I've liked it since I was a kid.

Well, back to hitting the books. Literally.

Immakicksomeobgynassihope

AkunOnA

Personals

Or some sort.

In short,


Name: Zulaika Zakaria
Age: 22
Hobbies: Being weird and hanging out with friends. Reading. And taking long walks at the beach ;) .
A little bit about me: I'm very kind, very helpful, a nice person all around. I'm loud and I am proud. I love my family and my friends. Currently still studying. I'm also the designated chauffeur. Get to know me. You won't be sorry. o_<> . . . . ....


Ok, so I made that up.

Anyway. My best friend. Mademoiselle Zulaika Zakaria. She's honestly, really, really kind. One of the best person I've ever met and I've been to the North of Malaysia and straight across the sea to Indonesia. She's patient. (anyone who can stand me is a freaking saint in my book). Is maybe family oriented but her friends are very important as well. She can be really random. Like suddenly do something weird in the mall kind of random. But that just makes being with her a lot of fun. She used to be very forgetful of the stuff she's carrying that I used to hide them. (bad friend XD ). And she used to be very hard to wake up in the mornings. She's the only person who can make me laugh so much, water comes out my nose (only applicable if I am drinking at the time).

She took care of me. And I am eternally grateful for that.

So, she's SINGLE!!!!! (thus the personal ad. Lame yeah I know. the creative juices, they aren't really flowing tonight). BUT YOU GET THE GIST!!!

Come on people. She's wonderful. She's single. And she's looking.


And it's her BIRTHDAY TODAY!!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZULAIKA!!! XOXOXOX


lamepostislamebutiloveyou

AKuNonA

p/s: miss zleka. if you have any additions, leave a comment and I'll edit and add it to the post. And I took the pictures from your facebook. I hope you don't mind and your friends don't kill me.

Pimp

As in pimping. As in what I'm doing now. As in:

Need any info on computers, software, apps and other internet stuffs? Go to this blog : fauzulbahari.com!

But that's the unpolished, very blunt version. ;D

fauzulbahari.com focuses on computer related stuff. So, as I said in the blunt version, it focuses on compters, software and the internet. As of recent perusal, some posts discuss the pros and cons of different software, some posts include recommendations, some are related to fun sites on the net and interspersed are snippets of the authors daily life as a student, brother and son. The site is rather new so there aren't a lot of posts as of yet but if you are interested in computer related things, I'm sure that this is one of the sites you would want to look out for.


Have any questions? Just leave a comment. The author hasn't included any contact details (that I can see, but I might have missed it being slightly sleep-deprived right now) so, I suggest leaving a comment if you have any questions. Or you could just follow him on twitter and tweet something over. Don't worry, I'm highly positive he's not rabid. (i kid)

Interested? There's a link on the sidebar, under the friends category but if you can't be bothered to scroll up or down, just click on the picture

Have fun reading. :)


thistotallycountsasabirthdaypresentsoHappyBirthday!

AkunOnA

Because Sho-chan would approve

I didn't make it in time to write Sho-chan's birthday post yesterday because I had to finish up writing a paper due Thursday.





I'm sure Sho-chan would approve ;D

So Aaaannyyyway....

Sakurai Sho-kun

Otanjoubi Omedettou!!! (a day late)

I so love Sho-chan. Right after Nino, my love for Sho-chan prevails. He succeeds and fails with equal enthusiasm. And his drawings are shite, but he's proud of em anyway.

So, to dear Sho-chan;

Happy 28th Birthday wishes to you. I hope that this year is better, and you stay healthy and happy and successful and everything. Good luck on Tokujo!! which I would watch if I could but I can't.

chesutoiswin/fail

AKuNonA

Congratulations are in order

to my brothers, utan and illin for obtaining good marks in their respective national exams.

We knew you could do it, thus we didn't mind hitting you on the head so much.

So, Illin is going to Tualang next year. My alma mater. It's a boarding school, so, he should toughen up a bit.

I have no idea what to say next. Keep up the good work! (that is so lame, but yeah)

PMR 8a's

UPSR 5a's

muahahahaha

AkuNonA

Aiba-chan...

Happy Belated Birthday Aiba-chan

A day late, but, Merry Christmas as well. Though, I read somewhere that Japan doesn't really observe christmas as a holiday. It being more of a couple's celebration than anything else. And they eat KFC for some reason.

So anyway, dear Aiba-chan. I remember you being the first Arashi member for whom I wrote a birthday wish for in my blog. Though at that time, it was the blog in friendster. Surprising how fast a year has gone past...

Anyway, Happy birthday Aiba. Stay as miraculous as you are. Know that, all around the world, fans are wishing you the best in as many ways possible. Be well, be happy and take care. :)


I can't seem to upload a picture at the moment but, I'll come back an edit this when the internet is once again, behaving. :)

minnanomirrormangasugoi

AKuNonA

Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha

A view of the nearest masjid from the landing in front of my room this raya morning.



sortofkindofmissingmylovedones

AkunOnA

Riida~ (v.2) and ...

Otanjoubi Omedettou

to dear-dear Oh-chan,

happy birthday.

have another wonderful year ahead.

take care of yourself

and

thank you for being riida :)

and because it's technically still the 26th in some parts of the world, I am NOT late. :P

___________________________________________________________________

also,

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha

to all muslims all around the world

let's remember the meaning of 'korban' or sacrifice again this year.

celebratingeachandevery

AKuNOnA

Riida~

...or 'leader', if you're felling particular.

So, in celebration of Ohno Month, the great and unflappable leader of Arashi, I drew a picture of him. BD

From AnS episode 119. Where he ate that "World's number 1 hottest ramen" and made the cutest expressions ever.

This man, is turning 29 this year, believe it or not.

oh-chan kawaii

There are actually two versions. This is an earlier one. The second one is where I repaired most stuff but, somehow, I like this one more? I dunno. :/

Either way, Happy Ohno month people!

youaremysoulsoul

AkunOnA

This is my

• I-am-deciphering-the-messages-hidden-in-my-lecture-notes face (i'm sure there's "diestudentsdie" in my surgery notes)
• Constipated face
• I-am-reading-your-mind face
• Trying to imagine Nino nek**d face
• Trying to imagine Arashi nek**d face
• Internal medicine is killing me face
• An ant just bit me face
• I have a big problem face
• I miss you face
• I shall now proceed to kick your A** face
• You are starting to piss me off face
• I love you face
• I am wasting time face

Take your pick.

HAPPY EXAM WEEK UKRIDA-ians!!!

We shall die the glorious death. And then get revived only to do it again in three weeks time.

Good luck everyone! You know you all secretly love it, right?

SelamatStudi

AKuNonA

p/s I am procrastinating. Anyone figured that out by now?